Adios Saigon

We have our last two days in Saigon before we have to deal with our 30 hours of travel back to the states. Time for some fun, drinking, and generally relaxing after our brutal tour. This is just an amazing city to hang out in. The people, the place and the atmosphere just make you feel so welcome. It’s organized chaos, but it’s somehow become normal to us.

We had to go and pick up our suits that we had made for us last week before we had headed north. They fit like a glove. I wasn’t expecting much to be honest, we did it more for the experience, but I’m impressed. The amount of money you save having them made here, almost makes it worth coming here once a year just to get suited and booted. After the suits, we decided to just get lost in the city and see where that takes us. It was a hot and humid 95 degrees, so we had to make sure we stayed hydrated, unfortunately the first bar we went in to fill up on fluids, somehow trapped us there for 7 hours. It was a well deserved, and well need wind down, but it made for a messy afternoon.

We woke up bright eyed and bushy tailed the next morning to jump on a tourist bus and head 2 hours to the Cu Chi tunnels. These are the tunnels the Viet Kong lived in when they were fighting the Americans during the war. It was crazy to see how basic these guys lived, and how they managed to beat the mighty American super power with not much more than an AK47 and some sharpened bamboo. It literally was as simple as that. We saw the crude “tiger traps” (that were pits hidden by leaves and filled with these sharpened bamboo that would impale the enemy), and we crawled through the tunnels where these people lived for a decade during the war. It was so basic, yet so complex. It was basic to the local people that knew how to navigate these dark, tiny tunnels, yet a dangerous maze for the enemy. No high tech gadgets here, just old fashioned jungle fighting skills. It was an interesting day.

We picked up a few more gifts to take back to the states, grabbed a beer and a massage from some random off the street (whilst we were enjoying the beer), a bite to eat and then went to pack.

It’s been a great trip and south east Asia will see me again soon.

The fun continues

Day 5 & 6:

Yesterday was the first day I didn't mind waking up and showering in the cold, it's just become the norm now. People think I'm fast at getting my clothes off, well you want to see me get dressed in 40 degree heat after a shower ...... I'm lightening quick at getting them back on.

We had breakfast overlooking the river and then set on our way north into the mountains. The next two days were pretty much offroad, which means that we are cold (what's new), muddy and you end up getting pretty beat up, but man it was fun. If there were any points were we were on some sort of road, it was in such bad condition it might as well been a track. Our destination today is Coa Bang, 100 miles away.

We experienced a few first in terms of cuisine. Fried bees was definitely a strange one (I just find it amazing what they eat here). If it wasn't for the tons of rice, I would have dropped 50 lbs for sure, and I've found myself slipping slowly into a vegetarian state ...... which is very strange seeing as I'm such a big meat eater normally. There's just something about the way animals are treated here and the look of it on your plate (I’m not talking chicken breast, I’m talking about hr head, brains and feet). Could it be Vietnam is turning me into a vegetarian hippy?

On day 6 we finally hit the Chinese boarder. It was kind of cool to be sat one side of the river in Vietnam, and look at the people in china only 10 meters away. I was surprised at the slack security between the two, but then again with both countries being communists, it's not like you would escape one if you were to flee to the other. The waterfall that separates the two countries made the journey well worth it. Now we had 40 miles over wet, slippery, muddy mountain passes until we get back to the hut that will be home for tonight. A tough 120 miles was covered today over about 8 hours of riding. Some of these mountain roads you struggle to even hit 15 mph without running a great risk of slipping off the edge. Being cautious is the key to survival here.

The hut was cold and the beds on the floor were hard, but we had beer, a fire (made in a pan) and a stereo, so we had our own little party. We also had a cooking class with the local family in the kitchen of their house, and we were made to eat our own creations........ luckily they were throwing around rice wine shots like there were going out of fashion, so if the food was no good, I would never had known anyway ....... but it all tasted fantastic to me. It's been a fun couple of days.

We are heading off now for our 120 mile journey, in the direction of Hanoi. The actual destination ....... who knows?

Day 7

Woke up to other wet day (you can see a pattern here). This time we were slightly more prepared. Waterproofs, poncho, 6 t-shirts, a riding jacket, jeans, waterproof pants, 2 pairs of socks, 2 plastic bags on my feet, boots and then boot covers. That should keep me warm and dry right? Wishful thinking. Rain is evil, no matter what you try, you can't beat it. After about an hour it was the same story. Wet again. Who cares anyway, it was still a great day riding ...... that was until I had my first crash. Well it was not so much a crash, but more of a skid. Luckily I avoided falling under the wheels of the 16 wheeler truck I was trying to pass on a muddy mountain pass, and the most damage I had was a broken clutch lever, a busted knee ....... and my hurt pride (Cameron picked it up on the head cam, so I’m sure I will be forced to relive it once or twice). Our guide had a spare clutch lever, not the correct one for my bike, but we made it work. Now I was cold, wet, covered in mud and riding with a busted knee. Not ideal, but it's all part of the experience. It's experiences like this that build your character ....... or that's what I was telling myself anyway.

Tomorrow we ride back to Hanoi and board our flight to Saigon. We are going to play tourist for a few days in the sun, then it's our 27 hour journey home,

Offorad Vietnam ......... DONE

The ride. Vietnam, day 1,2,3 and 4

Day one of the ride:

We start the day off by grabbing some breakfast with the hope it might make us feel better, as last night wasn't the relaxing night we had planned. 4 beers, a whole liter of gin and a 4am night is not the best preparation for the 120 miles we were about to cover on our bikes today.

We picked up our bikes, met the guide and then spent the next 3 hours trying to just stay alive on the roads of Hanoi. We were warned that the first day was all about getting out of the city traffic, and it was going to mean riding busy roads, filled with crazy drivers ........ luckily we already know how the game of chicken is played, so unless it was a push bike ....... we were giving way.

We passed some interesting sites, and seem to learn a little bit more about Vietnam culture every day. One of the big surprises today were that the paddy fields were scattered with graves. Firstly, I'm not sure how hygienic it is to bury dead people with the food you are about to consume. Secondly, if I was going to be buried ........ my work place would be the last place I would want to spend eternity. If, whoever is responsible, buries me anywhere near work, I promise you I will come back and haunt you.

Lunch was also interesting. We stopped at a little town called Son Tay, and we had previously told the guide that we are both big into experiencing local cultures, so don't worry about our western ways, we want to see the real Vietnam. I'm not sure if we will live to regret that statement? He tells us to look outside as our lunch will be "fresh" today, at that point the lady bends the chicken’s neck, whilst it is still flapping around, and calmly slits it throat. She lets it drain out, plucks it and the takes it to the kitchen. It truly was enough to make you become a vegetarian. We also had horse ........ but I was lucky enough to not see that slaughtered. We finished our lunch and jumped back on the bikes.

We are informed that our accommodation for the night is going to be a home stay, neither of us really knew what that meant, so we asked him if he could explain more. Basically, we are going to be living in someone's house. Sounds very authentic to me ....... so the idea was great. We head off the road down onto a muddy track, and as we turn the corner we see this beautiful wooden house on stilts on the edge of the rice fields. Papaya trees growing, pigs, chickens, vegetables ...... everything you need to be self sufficient. The family welcomed us by giving us a beer (I'm guess we aren't the first English guys they have come across then), we say our hellos in our best Vietnamese, and get ready to settle in for the night. We walk up the steps to the living area and it is all open plan. There are beds set up with nets over them, and we are all sleeping in one room. We are also eating in this one room ........ in fact the house is just one room. The view through our little opening was amazing (I won't use the word window because it literally was just an opening). They called us for dinner, so we all sit down, cross legged, eating family style. Every now and then the head of the house hold would raise his glass of homemade rice wine and shout "bonzu', this was a sign to stop eating and take a shot. He shouted "bonzu" A LOT.

We settled in for the night and slept like babies. We were woken by the roosters, that I'm sure are on the wrong time zone, at 4am. The sun rises, we sit down for our family breakfast, pack our bags and get back on the bikes.

Day two:

I like ridding and I love Vietnam, but add rain into that equation and it takes the shine off of both.

So today started well. We woke up, got treated to a great breakfast made by the family who's house / hut we shared last night, and then headed off to the lake, a short walk away. A little guy turns up with a 30 foot pole of bamboo and a large flat bottom boat. It's the son of the owner, and he treats us to a little tour of the lake, which I must say was a nice change to riding. Once finished, it’s back on the bike for the 120 miles we are going to cover today. That might not sound a lot, but when you are averaging 20/30 mph on these mountain roads ........ you're feeling it by the end. 

The scenery was great, the riding was great, and the lunch we had at the half way point was great (all normal meats today) .......... However, after lunch the rain starts. Being the smart guy I am, I packed light to come on this trip, so anything not required got left in the US. Items such as waterproof pants. I mean, why would you need those in the dry season on a motorbike trip? Big mistake. I spent the rest of the day in soaking wet jeans. Cold, wet, muddy jeans. We arrived at our next hut. Now these huts are great, authentic, hospitable places to stay, but if you want to dry your clothes whilst it's still raining ....... good luck. We built the best fire we could and hoped that the clothes would dry out. We then settled in for another night of good food, rice wine, beer and some quality time with some great locals .......... but if I hit my head on one of these roof beams again (I'm guessing they were built with 5'0 locals in mind) I'm going to rip it off ………. The beam not my head that is. 

Day three:

As soon as I woke up I checked the weather, it's raining, and then I checked our clothes, they are still wet. Not the best start, but what can you but smile and just enjoy the ride.

I did however have an amazing shower this morning (this place has hot water which is a bonus) and I got to brush my teeth in a sink ....... these are luxuries we take for granted I can tell you. We sit down for breakfast, load up the bikes and prepare ourselves for the ride ahead. I'm not going to let the rain ruin my trip, it's a mind over matter thing, I'm going to revel in the muddy conditions, and except the fact that the rain has made this trip even more extreme than it already is.

Within the first 10 minutes we were soaked through to the bone. Forget the waterproofing we had tried, the rain was just too much, and then we had the 40 degree temperatures to deal with, which wouldn't normally be a problem, if it wasn't for the 120 miles, through the mountains, we had ahead of us. I'm not going to lie, it was torture. It was a test of mental and physical strength when you are so cold, and so wet that you can long longer feel your face, feet or fingers. We stopped for lunch, but heating is a luxury that not many people have here ....... so much so that I have yet to see a place with heating, so it was safe to say we sat eating lunch in an opened front shop, drenched and cold ...... but still smiling. The afternoon actually cleared up, but the damage was done, my fingers were so cold I was struggling to changed gears. We rock into the village of Dong Van about 5pm, dying to grab a shower and get warm. We were told that we have the best hotel in Dong Van ........ this one has heating. We later find out that means this one has a box heater per room (which is hardly central heating). We made the most of it, I mean we managed to dry our clothes and heat the room, so we were happy.

Now, me and Cameron had both packed for "Vietnam" weather, by this I mean t-shirts and flip flops, so it was pretty funny when we meet up with our guide for dinner dressed like we were in the Caribbean, and he was dressed like he was on an arctic expedition. We couldn't eat dinner quick enough, so we could get back to our little hot palace (kind of) and get some rest. Let's hope tomorrow the rain gods have taken the day off.

Day four:

Well the rain has stopped and we can now see the mountains in all their glory, what an amazing view. The power had actually gone out in the village during the night (maybe our box heater used it all up, as we had left it on:-/), so we woke up with no heating. We didn't care, all we cared about was there was no rain. We went back to the place we had dinner (food options are limited in the town. I.e. this is the only place to eat), and they made us some English style pancakes and a ready mix coffee which was surprisingly good ...... I just can't do noodles for breakfast. We had to eat it the dark, but either way it tasted good. We also passed the local market enroute to breakfast, and managed to pick up some gear for the cold weather. Grip warmers for the bike, more waterproofs, waterproof covers for our boots and a few other items ........ there's no way I can do a another day like yesterday. We are heading north towards the Chinese boarder today, so we were expecting it to get colder and possibly wetter as we were going to be in the mountains......... this time though, we were going to be ready.

The riding today was nothing short of amazing. The views as we were going through the mountains, the kids faces as they see the bikes, and the weather ......the weather was gorgeous (compared to what we have had so far). 

It's hard to describe the people here. They have nothing, yet they are wanting for nothing. They are constantly laughing and just generally enjoying life. The kids faces light up when they see they bikes come through, they all stop what they are doing, and run to the road/track to wave. These kids are 3,4,5 years old and are farming day in, day out. We stopped to hand out sweets in the mountain villages. As the 4 year old puts down her farming sickle (knife) and holds out her dirty cut up hands, you can't help but notice how huge they are, I mean she had hands like a 10 year old. The guide explains that because she would have been farming in the mountains since she could walk, they have real hard, tough worker hands .... it's very sad to see. We grow up, throwing tantrums because we didn't get the latest iPod, and these kids are delighted they haven't got to carry the farmed corn back to the village in the rain. The candy got some smiles and a lot of waves though, I just wish I had more to give them. Clothes, toys or something of some use.

The three of us raced down through the mountains roads on easily the best day so far. Now that was a lot of fun. It's now shower time, a few beers by the river and some dinner. The hotel tonight has hot water and wifi (hence the huge post), but no heating, so it's all good ...... the heaters were over rated anyway.

Love you long time. Day one in 'nam

I don't know whether it's the great weather, the relaxed and easy going personalities or the diverse culture that makes Ho Chi Minh city such a charming place to hang out. Ok it's not the cleanest, wealthiest or prettiest of cities I've been to, but there's something about the people here that makes all that disappear.

You learn very quickly the dos and don’ts of touring HCMC. I knew being fresh tourists in such a strange and unknown environment, it's as going to take a few mistakes before we worked them out. I guessed being two pale white boys with back packs, we would stick out like a pork pie at a bar mitzvah......... I wasn't wrong.

Lesson number one. Don't even stop and talk to street traders, or before you know it you will have two pairs of sunglasses to add to the 30 you already don't need.

From the minute we left our hotel they were on us flies around a sh**. If you think you can get rid of the street traders, who are trying to sell you "original" Gucci sunglasses for 300 dong ($15), by hiding out in a restaurant, you're wrong. That doesn't scare these guys off. So plan "B" was to humor them for a few minutes thinking that if I just listen to what they had to say, they will leave me alone ....... I now own one pair of Oakley and one pair of Gucci sunglasses. Both real of course, and for a knock down price of $17 for the two.

First on the agenda was to find me some underwear. I was still without my cases and although I had on the same t-shirt I had traveled in the day before, I refused to put on the underwear. So until I could find some replacements, I was going commando, but with HCMC being so hot and humid this wasn't going to cut it for long. We found a cyclos (basically a bike with a basket thing on the front you sit in). For 50,000 dong ($2.5) he would take me shopping to find some clean boxers. Perfect.

This was our first experience of the craziness. Scooters race around the streets like an army of ants, with no respect for rules such as which side of the road to drive on. At every intersection you find yourself in a game of chicken with at least 150 others vehicles. There's generally a rule that a bus beats a car, a car beats a scooter, and a scooter beats a bicycle (pedestrians don't even rank). Where does a cyclos come in this chain ......... well my man thought he trumped them all.

It was obvious that when I got to the store (to collect my new underwear), I was going to have to buy more than one pair, as it was very possible that I would use at least one pair just getting back to the hotel.

The shopping was a success, and with my new socks, boxers and t-shirt I felt ready to take on the city. The next stop was the war memorial museum. By this points our cyclos drivers had talked us into using them to be our drivers for the day....... whilst in Rome do as the Romans, so why the hell not.

The war memorial museum was amazing. From the American tanks, planes, helicopters and boats that were displayed in the front like some kind of trophy, to the eye opening images and facts we picked up inside. All I can say is that every story has two sides, and I have only ever heard one side of the Vietnam war. I now have a better understanding of why, how and what the war was about. It gets all too political if I share my views, but as bad as the war was, the things these people went though, I left having gained a new respect for a nation has picked themselves up, and moved on without much bother at all. It was a pretty somber experience, but an interesting one to say the least.

The rest of the day was filled with more tourist stuff. Surviving the roads, eating unknown food items, drinking warm beer chilling by ice cubes, haggling for goods that will probably spend their life in the bottom of a draw and genrally taking way too many pictures of scenes that would be boring to anyone else looking at them. You know the pictures I'm talking about.

Lesson number two. Agree a price before hand.

We finished up and told the drivers to take us back to the hotel. They pull up and drop us off, give us a few compliments and then tell us it's going to cost 2,000,000 dong each for their services. That's $100 each, which we know from our tourist book is the average monthly wage. Something tells me they are trying to rip us off. We laughed at them and tell them no way, although we are being careful to not cause too much of a scene at the same time. I'm just guessing, but if the police get involved, I sure the two pale white boys white back packs are going to have to pay even more to get out of this (money rules in these parts of the world). We haggle for about 10 minutes and get away with 800,000 dong each. Still probably way overpriced but serves us right for thinking they had our interests at heart. Lesson learnt, and I can promise that won't happen twice.

Next stop in the morning is the airport to head to Hanoi where we pick up the bikes. Now the real trip begins.

Start as you DON'T mean to go on

Wow what a journey. We arrived at Houston airport with plenty of time to spare. Checked our bags and picked up our boarding passes. I boarded the plane to find I have an extra seat next to me whilst also sitting in the exit isle. Apart from not having a seat that reclines to a full bed, bad food and lack of free toiletries..... It could have almost been mistaken for first class. Things were going good ....... a little too good.

We landed in Tokyo about 30 minutes late. Not a major deal as we have an hour until our connecting flight to Ho Chi Minh City. We join the masses to enter the security check point for connecting flight to Saigon. I would be lying if I said I wasn't concerned that the size of the line was going to push our time limit to the max. As we make it to the scanner I check my watch and see we have 15 minutes. That's easy. Whizz through the scanner and head to the gate right? ........WRONG. They want to re scan Cameron's bag, which is no biggie. Then they want to scan it again? After the second time Cameron gets pulled to one side, but with 15 minutes to spare, we don't have the time to hang around going through his dirty underwear just to find a chewing gum wrapper. "Do you have a knife?" the woman asks. "Of course not" Cameron replies in a chuckle. At which point she pulls out a 4 1/2" blade. Nobody was laughing anymore, it all got very serious. We explained that it must have been there since Houston and they hadn't picked it up at security, but the language barrier was proving to be a little bit of a problem. They were speaking in badly broken English, and neither me nor Cameron were about to bust out any Japanese skills.

Long story short, we managed to persuade them not to take us to the airport police and let us on our way. One guard agreed, and the other two wanted the police involve. Lucky for us our “friend” was the boss, so off we went. We sprint to the gate and make the end of the line as they as finishing boarding. Phew.

That was just too stressful after the journey we had just gone through. We arrive in Vietnam, all smiles and even a little cheeky high five to display our relief at making it after being so close to missing the last flight out of Japan. It's 11pm now, it's been a long 27 hours, so let's get through immigration and head to the bar. You can imagine our horror when immigration ask for our visa ...... a visa we have no idea about. Now, we had asked this question in Houston, and were told that you didn't need one for a vacation. That person was wrong. You need one alright, and you needed to get it in the USA 5 days before you fly. Again with a massive language barrier we do our best to explain. I hear "send you back to Tokyo" somewhere in his sentence followed by "it costs" ..... Now he has my attention, because I've come too far to turn around now. I badger him to give me a price. 1 million, 2 million, 300 thousand ...... there are figures being thrown all over the place. He now has a little smug grin, because he realizes what we already knew ...... whatever it takes, we will pay to get in. We agreed a price (of course it has to be in local cash, because I very much doubt this is going in the book) and off I head to the ATM, withdrawal a few million dong, and we are in. Let's get our bags and get to the bar.

We are now late for the baggage claim, so we know our bags will have been taken off and put somewhere off to the side (it's now about 12.30 am). We see Cameron's bag over at lost and found  (seeing as we checked in together, I expected to see mine right next to it). We go over to collect our bags when I hear in this little voice say "Mr Grew?" ..... "what now" was the only thing that went through my mind. Well I'm informed my bags are still in Houston, and because there's only one flight a day my bags will be with me in 2 days. I can't even explain how exhausting this journey has been. I had no energy left. I was tired, jet lagged, hungry, broken and just generally beaten up. I took the paper work, along with the 2 million dong she gave me to buy some underwear and a toothbrush ......... and then finally .......... off we went to the bar.